


And Then The Darkness Consumed Him

by Timelord_From_Erebor



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Merlin Memory Month, Post-Canon, Sad, Wordcount: 100-1.000, Wordcount: 100-500, references to canon character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-31
Updated: 2019-05-31
Packaged: 2020-03-07 21:02:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18881206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Timelord_From_Erebor/pseuds/Timelord_From_Erebor
Summary: Nearly ten years after the Battle of Camlann, Merlin drowns in his memories and suffocates in his dreams...Written for Merlin Memory Month 2019: Day 9, Path 1..First line credit to @_BreakingAway_ on Wattpad, this is being entered into their contest





	And Then The Darkness Consumed Him

The dreams were recurring, and frightening to say the least. It had been almost a decade since Arthur died. He’d thought the dreams would’ve stopped by now, but alas they did not. Every night he was woken by the sound of him choking on his own tears. It was the only time when he let himself be Merlin, not Emrys. Emrys was strong, Merlin was vulnerable and broken.

Merlin was consumed by darkness, cursed to outlive all those he cared about, so in the light of day, he became Emrys. Emrys gave counsel to young witches and warlocks who came to him seeking it. But at night, the memories flooded his mind, the only way to escape them was sleep. Sleep brought the dreams. The dreams broke him even more.

Time seemed to have stopped for him, as if he were in his own little bubble. A bubble where everything stopped the day he sent Arthur out onto the lake. He had stayed near Camelot for a while, but he could never bring himself to enter. He couldn’t bear to admit it was over. Since before he was even of age he had lived within those walls. With Arthur. But Arthur was gone now. Just like Freya, and Lancelot, and Will, and Gwaine, and so many more.

He had entered on only one occasion, Gwaine’s funeral. He stood away from the crowd, hiding in the trees, but he was noticed by those closest to him. Leon and Percival were escorting the queen back to the palace, not for protection but for mutual support, when Leon heard Merlins sobs. They had stayed back, ignoring the stares from courtiers, knights and merchants alike. When there was no one left, Merlin revealed himself. They talked for many hours, and said their goodbyes. This is what Merlin thought of when he was lucid enough in his dreams, the only vaguely happy memory he could conjure without those he had lost in those, the darkest hours.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this one shot I wrote for Merlin Memory Month. 
> 
> This is for the last day but I have four days to write an upload for the other days so hopefully that’ll happen. 
> 
> (In case you were wondering, yes I do procrastinate this much with all aspects of my life).


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